Stay tuned.....

Phew, there has been a lot of germs rolling around the house in the past week. I was down and out for the weekend and Analise woke up puking in the night on Monday.
I *think* (knock wood, cross fingers, spit in the wind) everyone is on the mend.

I better say a prayer right now

New kid on the block

All praise the new pup! The Lawyer saw an ad in the paper yesterday for a rat......terrier, the breed I have been wanting. She called, we went, we bought, we are in love. Frances got the honor of naming her - she chose Daisy. Daisy is 8 weeks old, 4 1/2 lbs and will grow to about 15lbs. She is a little chunk of love and we all treat her like a baby. Our other dog Cody is 14, deaf and was SO depressed after her pal Georgie died last month. She was so happy to see the little rat! She was prancing around. Let's hope the love fest continues for all of us!

Loose teeth, Target glasses and Props to the Lawyer

Last week I offered the kids' dentist her pick of my children to pay off the enormous bills we get from her. I took all four for cleanings and I came out with 5 appointments for 3 extractions, 2 spacers, 1 crown, 3 fillings and the next phase of braces for Frances. Ana and Lewis are responsible for all the rotten teeth in the family. The dentist just cracked up when I offered up a child but did think it would add a little spice to her family.

Ana pulled out one of her front teeth that was slated to get yanked. It just wasn't coming out and the dentist was getting concerned. Since this will save me considerable money, the tooth fairy might just be giving Ana a bonus tonight. I told Ana if she can get the other front tooth (very loose) out by January 30th, I'd be one happy gal.


Lewis has taken to wearing my reading glasses, for some odd reason. I asked if he could see better with them on and he said "No, I just like looking like you!" I buy a few pairs every time they show up in the dollar bin at Target!

And a shout out to the Lawyer - Happy Birthday Girlfriend! I'm making coq au vin, couscous with cauliflower, salad & tiramisu for dinner!

Grand Master Flash

I think that many of you China-Mama-Readers have young children. You haven't yet experienced the joy [hack, spew] of tweendom. Frances is 9 AND A HALF. Although physical puberty is still in the not so near future, she is at a "special" age.
I recently found a West Coast Chopper skull cap.......ok, it was on the floor at the Monster Truck Jam........ok, maybe that strikes you as a *tad* disgusting but I washed it. I couldn't pass it by. There was no lost and found, thank goodness.
So this morning I put on my new lid and told Frances I was going to wear it when I dropped her off at a birthday party she was going to. She screeched and chased me around the house, trying to yank it off my head. Her party was at a roller skating place and I told her I was also going to stay, rent skates on my own and skate while she was at her party. The mortified look on her face was awesome.
As we were going to the party (I took off my hat) she said "Mama, could you PLEASE not stay and skate. Just drop me off." There was a huge sigh of relief when I told her I was only kidding about staying.

Do I look cool OR WHAT?

The poop on diapers

My sister, Anne has 4 children and my other sister, Suzanne decided once to calculate how many diapers Anne had changed in her lifetime. Since disgusting subjects are so much fun, I decided to do the math for my own children. The results are .......... a bit stunning. My children were adopted at ages 12m, 18m, 2y2m & 41/2y so the results only include MY changing them!
Months in diapers - 26+33+24 = 83 months
Days in diapers 83x30 = 2490 days
Changes per day (at LEAST 6) 2490x6 = 14,940 diapers
Minutes to change one diaper - 5 14,940x5 = 74,700 minutes
Hours changing diapers - 74,700 divided by 60 = 1,245 hours
I HAVE CHANGED DIAPERS FOR 1,245 HOURS!!
Divide 1,245 by 8 and
It's like working 8 hours a day as a diaper changer for 152 days
Divide 1,245 by 40 and
It's like working full time as a diaper changer for 31 weeks!!
That's a whole lot of stink!

WTF?

"Now, especially in the bigger and richer cities where abandonment has gradually decreased, more and more orphanage directors are sitting on rather empty buildings. They have no children to fill the poorly-planned and overly-large facilities. Their question is, “What would I do if no more children lived in my orphanage?” Not wanting to lose their jobs, and desiring to legitimize their existence and to showcase their accomplishments, more and more orphanage directors decide to keep a certain number of children in the orphanage. They don’t welcome foster care programs, and they don’t care about the international or domestic adoption program either.
What these directors need to hear and understand is: “No matter how beautiful your facility is, it is not a loving home where a child belongs.” But this is easy for us to say. For them, it is about their job, their livelihood, and their pride, no matter how hypocritical and selfish."

As a Mama with 4 beautiful children from China, I feel so deeply for the people who are waiting....and waiting....and waiting for their referrals. When I saw the above quote from the director of one of the agencies I used, I was so pissed off. What can we do? My oldest daughter, Frances was in one of the orphanages "showcased" in "The Dying Rooms," a 1996 documentary about the horrendous care in Chinese orphanages, including "dying rooms" where certain kids were left to die. MY FRANCES WAS THERE! I decided to write a letter to each of my kids' orphanage directors and describe what their lives are like in our family and include LOTS of pictures. It might do nothing but it will put an image in their minds that they can't deny.

A very special Sunday afternoon

Because I fancy myself an adventurous soul, I agreed to make this year's Monster Truck Thunder Nationals a family affair. Every year Lewis and Lisa go and enjoy the splendor and white trashiness of this cultural event. I H-A-T-E-D IT! Loud and stinky..... and those were just my fellow spectators.
Low-lights included:
Monster Trucks crushing cars!

More Monster Trucks crushing cars!

Some sort of competition - don't know how a "winner" was determined but the driver was a hotty young woman.

Monster Truck donut competition!

I brought along a book on the pretense that there would be some "down time" and I might be bored. I think I really just wanted to mark a clear differentiation between "me" and "them." "See! I read! I'm not a motorhead!"......even though it was a kid's book!

Just hanging around

I walked past the family room today and saw this:

Elly was not having any part of it. She is a feet-firmly-grounded sort of girl. I have NEVER let her on the top bunk of the bunkbed. I know she would either fall off or dive off.

Said girl just had a WONKER of a tantrum. Some day I'm going to videotape one and post it. Maybe Ty from that pimp-your-house show will call me and offer to make an annex, just for Elly.

Priceless words

Breaking up is hard to do.......

Conversation with Lewis on Wednesday:
Me - "Hey Lewie, what was new at school today?
L - "Alec and I broke up"
M - "You what?"
L - "WE BROKE UP"
M - "What does broke up mean?"
L - "Mama, it means we are not friends anymore"
M - "Why, what happened?"
L - "Alec said 'I hate you,' he got sent out to the hall and now we are broken up"

Thursday:
L - "Mama, Alec and I are NOT broken up anymore"
M - "What happened today?"
L - "Alec was nice so we don't have to break up. He said sorry."
Is this the drama I have to look forward to in the years to come?

Happy New Year!

Happy 2008! The kids are all back at school and I have an extra day off! This is my year to slap the children away from my teats so I can have a *little* more time to myself...... to do those luxuries like bleaching the 'stash, plucking the eyebrows, maybe a little exercise???